The past couple of weeks have given me a new view on things. With feeling as though I don’t have time to do the things that I know need to get done and the things that I would like to do, I start to feel frustrated and even a little broken. I never thought that serving a mission would make me feel pure joy and heart broken all at the same time.
I have noticed that this past week I have been asking myself ” am I living life or am I just existing?”. Pushing the question aside, I decided that I was just going to enjoy the week.
The week started out by us making home made spud nuts! If you don’t know what that is, its home made donuts with potatoes in it. I will say that they are yummy and make your taste buds dance! We so many of them and new that we would eat all of them, so we decided that we would give them away.
The thing that I noticed was every person that we brought them to you could see how their face shifted. How the light in their eyes would start to shine. It was such a simple thing but yet it was more than that. I have always been some who loves the little and simple things. The spud nuts may not be the most fancy thing in the world but they were made with lots of love and laughter. One of the people that we gave them to ended up inviting us over for a pizza party later on that week.
Later on during the week we had checked the weather and saw that Wednesday would be a perfect day to do another hot chocolate stand! We were so excited, our minds just going with all the fun ideas that we could do. The memories of the past hot chocolate stand that we had done a month ago just flowing through our minds. The ladies that worked at the store got all excited and they just made you feel like you were someone special.
Towards the end of the hot chocolate stand as we were starting to clean up this lady came up to us and started to talk about us. Asking us why we are doing this and what church we are from. As we got talking, I noticed something, with every person who had asked us why were doing it or where were from all of their light in their eyes had changed. It wasn’t the hot chocolate or the candy that we gave out, it was the love that was behind it. The laughter that was there and the love that was shared with each cup of hot chocolate and piece of candy that was given. Nothing was special about those things but the love that came from the heart was pure love.
We got to spend some time with a lady with a beautiful soul, who taught us how to make cards. With things that we all face it’s nice to have a friend who is there. Allie has the most beautiful souls that I have ever seem. With many gifts that she is willing to share with us and put up with our craziness!
While make these cards we got to talk about the Book Of Mormon and what we love about it. Even though some answers were short and simple the thing that really stuck out to me was ” the feeling of love that comes from just reading it”! No matter what the topic was that we talked about their was just something about the time we had together. The feeling of friends, love and laughter that just filled our souls and made them feel complete!
At the end of the week we got together with the Hermanas Sisters. As we were out doing a blitz in our area we got to talk to this sweet girl who is about our age. As we got to talk to her, I noticed that she had light about her. She talked about why she loves God and why she believes in something higher than her. After we left her house a thought came to of how lucky we are to be able to just talk to people and to share the things that we hold dear to our hearts. The things that bring us love and happiness in this world.
The answer to my question of whether or not I was living or just existing, was so simple. I was looking with my eyes and not my heart. To live is to enjoy, to love the people around you. I was living because I was loving life. All the people and the memories that I make with them will always be apart of my life.
The greatest lesson that Ive been able to learn is to look through the heart not the eyes. The way that I feel when I open the scriptures, the pure love that is there with each word that is written is the same love that I feel when I am with people. The Love of Christ is always with us and that is how we live. We live with His love in our hearts, spreading that love to who ever is around.
“….seek that ye look to God and live.” ( Alma 37:43-47)